2.1 Beliefs and Your Money Story
What’s Your Money Story?
One of the most important things you can do to improve your financial situation is to understand your money story. It’s important to identify your existing relationship with money—what you are saying about money, how you feel about it, what you believe about it, and how you use it.
We all think that circumstances cause us to think a certain way — such as “the economy is bad” or that a person or situation is the problem. Your thoughts create your reality. One of our last true freedoms in life is the ability to choose how we think about a circumstance. You have the power to decide how you think about any situation in your life.
Your thoughts about a situation drive your feelings/emotions that in turn drive your behaviors and actions in the world, which lead to the results you have right now in your life.
Your thoughts and beliefs create your reality
So the key is to learn to observe what you are thinking and discern the critical voices we all have in our heads that we automatically believe. You want to begin to listen to the only voice that matters – your Higher Self (intuition or soul) and learn to notice when your ego (little self) is on overdrive reacting to fear.
When you can question what you have believed all of your life that was a negative money story, belief or fear, this leads to freedom. Part of that process is finding proof or evidence for what you believe to be true. Most of the time we walk around believing the opposite because the mind will seek evidence for anything it believes to be true.
When you get conscious of the stories you are telling others and begin to observe them, it’s important to ask yourself, do you I really want to be telling that story? Is it empowering or dis-empowering? This is why we question what we believe about ourselves and find our own truth. Inquiry can be quite liberating. In fact, this is the #1 path to freedom!
You want to understand your feelings about money because your past experiences, emotions / feelings, thoughts and beliefs will drive your behavior – consciously and unconsciously. One of the first things to do is become conscious of your money story, and begin to study your mode of operation (MO).
Your family money legacy. This was probably passed down generation to generation and was never questioned. What is the family legacy you grew up with regarding money? What were the circumstances of your family life and your grandparent’s life?
I grew up with a single mother trying to support four kids. She worked hard for her money but only seemed to scrape by. I noticed that in my late 20s and even into my 30s, that I had adopted this money story. I made a lot of money - into the 6 figures - but it was “hard” and at what cost. I was sick and tired all of the time.
Then I would blow it all and go into debt. Then have to work hard to get myself out. And the pattern went on.
Begin to study the patterns, beliefs or behaviors you witnessed growing up that shaped your money legacy.
What you make these events mean is the money story you will live out in your life
Wealth is a state of mind. It’s all a perception. We may have money in the bank or in the stock market, but we always have the Universal thought “I don’t have enough.” Now that we have electronic transactions and our government just keeps printing more money, do we really have the money we believe we have?
We tend to give money a lot of power and even give our personal power away to money. We define our success by how much money we make or don’t make. In our society we have a “lack” mentality. We never have enough, whether it’s the latest fashion or hottest pair of boots or the next version of software or the newest iPhone. We are taught to consume and advertising convinces us we need more.
My belief is that at the end of our lives, what matters most is whom we loved and if we lived with integrity and service.
Homework
Answer a series of questions to begin to develop your money story:
1. Did your family experience a defining moment around money? A defining moment shapes our beliefs – we take away from that experience a meaning. If your family experienced a catalytic event – one that was significant such as losing family wealth, losing a job, living through the Depression, or a divorce that caused financial duress, this would shape your beliefs about money.
2. Did your family experience sudden wealth or financial success?
3. What memories do you have of your parents discussing money? Did they argue about money or did one parent have a different view on spending and saving than the other parent?
4. What was your earliest memory about money?
5. Do you have any unhappy memories around money from your childhood until now?
6. What positive memories do you have with money from childhood until now?
7. What emotions did your family associate with money?
How would you define the status of your family growing up? Were they considered rich, poor or middle class?
1. What emotions did you experience as a child around the status of your family’s financial situation?
2. What did you witness as a child between your parents around handing money?
3. As you grew up, how did money limit or expand the possibilities of your education and extra curricular activities?
4. How did money factor in around your choices to go to college or not or to take a job or to get into a relationship?
5. What have you learned throughout your life about your ability to generate money?
6. How do you (and your partner, if applicable) relate to money now?
7. What emotions do you experience regularly around financial decisions?
8. How has money expanded or contracted your life now?
9. What do you say to yourself or others when you see something you want to buy? Do you say, “We can’t afford it?”, “You don’t need that, that’s frivolous” or something else.
10. What words describe what money means to you? Make a list of words to describe money. Take each word and write a sentence about what that word means to you.
Now write one paragraph…”My current relationship with money is….”
Identifying Limiting Beliefs
On the lines below, write the limiting beliefs that keep you stuck and frustrated in a reality you longer wish to experience. Write out your feelings so that you’re clear about what it is that frustrates you and why you’re ready to change. This is an important key to clarifying what you do want.
“I’m ready to let go of old beliefs and habits that do not support me. [God, Lord, Angels, the Universe...] please help me to recognize and release the limiting beliefs that stop me from becoming the person I need to be to experience ___________________________________.”
(Please write in your authentic desire for a specific outcome and/or money experience you would like to create for yourself.)
One of my limiting beliefs was that making money, lots of money, was hard work. This was frustrating to me because working hard always made me extremely tired and I would eventually get sick. Then go into debt. Then work my way out of debt by working hard.
I decided that I wanted to make money every day in fun and easy ways to that I could live the lifestyle of my dreams of working when I wanted and playing/traveling when I wanted. I adopted the affirmation, Money comes to me every day in fun and easy ways. I also looked for evidence where this was already true in my life...like the time where I sold my house and other real estate holdings for much more than I paid for them, or the time when I put several of my massage continuing education classes on-line (back in 2010) and continue to make money from them today...
It is not necessary to look for proof in your own life as you can look for evidence in other people’s lives (of people you know or have just heard about) because for it to be true for one person it can be true for you as well.
Limiting Belief #1
______________________________________________
What frustrates/hurts me about this pattern is: _______________________________________________________
I’m ready to change because I want to experience this result/an experience that leaves me feeling good: ____________________________________________________
Limiting Belief #2
______________________________________________
What frustrates/hurts me about this pattern is: _______________________________________________________
I’m ready to change because I want to experience this result/an experience that leaves me feeling good: ____________________________________________________
Limiting Belief #3
______________________________________________
What frustrates/hurts me about this pattern is: _______________________________________________________
I’m ready to change because I want to experience this result/an experience that leaves me feeling good: ____________________________________________________
Keep going, on a separate piece of paper, if you find more limiting beliefs rearing their ugly heads.
Designing New, Affirming Beliefs
From identifying what you don’t want, you’re able to identify what you DO want. Ready? Let’s go! In the spaces below create new, affirming beliefs that you would like to experience. Remember you are a deliberate creator. Life is your canvas. If you could have it any way you wanted, how would you want it to be? Go for it ~ don’t hold back! Design from the heart.
From my past, painful experience of _________________
______________________________________________ (the limiting belief), I now consciously create a new affirming belief that creates ______________________________________________________________________
(an affirming belief statement that reflects the result(s) you wish to experience). I affirm this new belief as my new reality, spanning across all time and space, and filling me with feelings of happiness, empowerment, creativity and abundance wealth.
From my past, painful experience of _______________________________________________________________
(the limiting belief), I now consciously create a new affirming belief that creates ________________________
______________________________________________. I affirm this new belief as my new reality, spanning across all time and space, and filling me with feelings of happiness, empowerment, creativity and abundance wealth.
From my past, painful experience of _______________________________________________________________
(the limiting belief), I now consciously create a new affirming belief that creates ________________________
______________________________________________. I affirm this new belief as my new reality, spanning across all time and space, and filling me with feelings of happiness, empowerment, creativity and abundance wealth.
Keep in mind that this is an ongoing process. The more expansion you step into, the more limiting beliefs will emerge. One thing I would like to mention is that there is great power in focusing your energy toward the new affirming belief as opposed to attempting to fix flaws or limiting beliefs.
The power, your power, is always in placing your energy into what you wish to experience. It is in learning in this direction, that the blocks that have been holding you back will eventually surface for you to examine. You can’t help it, because as you continue to lean into remembering the truth that you are unlimited, that those false limitations will make themselves known so that you can consciously release them and rewrite your reality.
What’s Next:
On Wednesday, we look at more ways to change your money story.
What’s Your Money Story?
One of the most important things you can do to improve your financial situation is to understand your money story. It’s important to identify your existing relationship with money—what you are saying about money, how you feel about it, what you believe about it, and how you use it.
We all think that circumstances cause us to think a certain way — such as “the economy is bad” or that a person or situation is the problem. Your thoughts create your reality. One of our last true freedoms in life is the ability to choose how we think about a circumstance. You have the power to decide how you think about any situation in your life.
Your thoughts about a situation drive your feelings/emotions that in turn drive your behaviors and actions in the world, which lead to the results you have right now in your life.
Your thoughts and beliefs create your reality
So the key is to learn to observe what you are thinking and discern the critical voices we all have in our heads that we automatically believe. You want to begin to listen to the only voice that matters – your Higher Self (intuition or soul) and learn to notice when your ego (little self) is on overdrive reacting to fear.
When you can question what you have believed all of your life that was a negative money story, belief or fear, this leads to freedom. Part of that process is finding proof or evidence for what you believe to be true. Most of the time we walk around believing the opposite because the mind will seek evidence for anything it believes to be true.
When you get conscious of the stories you are telling others and begin to observe them, it’s important to ask yourself, do you I really want to be telling that story? Is it empowering or dis-empowering? This is why we question what we believe about ourselves and find our own truth. Inquiry can be quite liberating. In fact, this is the #1 path to freedom!
You want to understand your feelings about money because your past experiences, emotions / feelings, thoughts and beliefs will drive your behavior – consciously and unconsciously. One of the first things to do is become conscious of your money story, and begin to study your mode of operation (MO).
Your family money legacy. This was probably passed down generation to generation and was never questioned. What is the family legacy you grew up with regarding money? What were the circumstances of your family life and your grandparent’s life?
I grew up with a single mother trying to support four kids. She worked hard for her money but only seemed to scrape by. I noticed that in my late 20s and even into my 30s, that I had adopted this money story. I made a lot of money - into the 6 figures - but it was “hard” and at what cost. I was sick and tired all of the time.
Then I would blow it all and go into debt. Then have to work hard to get myself out. And the pattern went on.
Begin to study the patterns, beliefs or behaviors you witnessed growing up that shaped your money legacy.
What you make these events mean is the money story you will live out in your life
Wealth is a state of mind. It’s all a perception. We may have money in the bank or in the stock market, but we always have the Universal thought “I don’t have enough.” Now that we have electronic transactions and our government just keeps printing more money, do we really have the money we believe we have?
We tend to give money a lot of power and even give our personal power away to money. We define our success by how much money we make or don’t make. In our society we have a “lack” mentality. We never have enough, whether it’s the latest fashion or hottest pair of boots or the next version of software or the newest iPhone. We are taught to consume and advertising convinces us we need more.
My belief is that at the end of our lives, what matters most is whom we loved and if we lived with integrity and service.
Homework
Answer a series of questions to begin to develop your money story:
1. Did your family experience a defining moment around money? A defining moment shapes our beliefs – we take away from that experience a meaning. If your family experienced a catalytic event – one that was significant such as losing family wealth, losing a job, living through the Depression, or a divorce that caused financial duress, this would shape your beliefs about money.
2. Did your family experience sudden wealth or financial success?
3. What memories do you have of your parents discussing money? Did they argue about money or did one parent have a different view on spending and saving than the other parent?
4. What was your earliest memory about money?
5. Do you have any unhappy memories around money from your childhood until now?
6. What positive memories do you have with money from childhood until now?
7. What emotions did your family associate with money?
How would you define the status of your family growing up? Were they considered rich, poor or middle class?
1. What emotions did you experience as a child around the status of your family’s financial situation?
2. What did you witness as a child between your parents around handing money?
3. As you grew up, how did money limit or expand the possibilities of your education and extra curricular activities?
4. How did money factor in around your choices to go to college or not or to take a job or to get into a relationship?
5. What have you learned throughout your life about your ability to generate money?
6. How do you (and your partner, if applicable) relate to money now?
7. What emotions do you experience regularly around financial decisions?
8. How has money expanded or contracted your life now?
9. What do you say to yourself or others when you see something you want to buy? Do you say, “We can’t afford it?”, “You don’t need that, that’s frivolous” or something else.
10. What words describe what money means to you? Make a list of words to describe money. Take each word and write a sentence about what that word means to you.
Now write one paragraph…”My current relationship with money is….”
Identifying Limiting Beliefs
On the lines below, write the limiting beliefs that keep you stuck and frustrated in a reality you longer wish to experience. Write out your feelings so that you’re clear about what it is that frustrates you and why you’re ready to change. This is an important key to clarifying what you do want.
“I’m ready to let go of old beliefs and habits that do not support me. [God, Lord, Angels, the Universe...] please help me to recognize and release the limiting beliefs that stop me from becoming the person I need to be to experience ___________________________________.”
(Please write in your authentic desire for a specific outcome and/or money experience you would like to create for yourself.)
One of my limiting beliefs was that making money, lots of money, was hard work. This was frustrating to me because working hard always made me extremely tired and I would eventually get sick. Then go into debt. Then work my way out of debt by working hard.
I decided that I wanted to make money every day in fun and easy ways to that I could live the lifestyle of my dreams of working when I wanted and playing/traveling when I wanted. I adopted the affirmation, Money comes to me every day in fun and easy ways. I also looked for evidence where this was already true in my life...like the time where I sold my house and other real estate holdings for much more than I paid for them, or the time when I put several of my massage continuing education classes on-line (back in 2010) and continue to make money from them today...
It is not necessary to look for proof in your own life as you can look for evidence in other people’s lives (of people you know or have just heard about) because for it to be true for one person it can be true for you as well.
Limiting Belief #1
______________________________________________
What frustrates/hurts me about this pattern is: _______________________________________________________
I’m ready to change because I want to experience this result/an experience that leaves me feeling good: ____________________________________________________
Limiting Belief #2
______________________________________________
What frustrates/hurts me about this pattern is: _______________________________________________________
I’m ready to change because I want to experience this result/an experience that leaves me feeling good: ____________________________________________________
Limiting Belief #3
______________________________________________
What frustrates/hurts me about this pattern is: _______________________________________________________
I’m ready to change because I want to experience this result/an experience that leaves me feeling good: ____________________________________________________
Keep going, on a separate piece of paper, if you find more limiting beliefs rearing their ugly heads.
Designing New, Affirming Beliefs
From identifying what you don’t want, you’re able to identify what you DO want. Ready? Let’s go! In the spaces below create new, affirming beliefs that you would like to experience. Remember you are a deliberate creator. Life is your canvas. If you could have it any way you wanted, how would you want it to be? Go for it ~ don’t hold back! Design from the heart.
From my past, painful experience of _________________
______________________________________________ (the limiting belief), I now consciously create a new affirming belief that creates ______________________________________________________________________
(an affirming belief statement that reflects the result(s) you wish to experience). I affirm this new belief as my new reality, spanning across all time and space, and filling me with feelings of happiness, empowerment, creativity and abundance wealth.
From my past, painful experience of _______________________________________________________________
(the limiting belief), I now consciously create a new affirming belief that creates ________________________
______________________________________________. I affirm this new belief as my new reality, spanning across all time and space, and filling me with feelings of happiness, empowerment, creativity and abundance wealth.
From my past, painful experience of _______________________________________________________________
(the limiting belief), I now consciously create a new affirming belief that creates ________________________
______________________________________________. I affirm this new belief as my new reality, spanning across all time and space, and filling me with feelings of happiness, empowerment, creativity and abundance wealth.
Keep in mind that this is an ongoing process. The more expansion you step into, the more limiting beliefs will emerge. One thing I would like to mention is that there is great power in focusing your energy toward the new affirming belief as opposed to attempting to fix flaws or limiting beliefs.
The power, your power, is always in placing your energy into what you wish to experience. It is in learning in this direction, that the blocks that have been holding you back will eventually surface for you to examine. You can’t help it, because as you continue to lean into remembering the truth that you are unlimited, that those false limitations will make themselves known so that you can consciously release them and rewrite your reality.
What’s Next:
On Wednesday, we look at more ways to change your money story.